My Daily 86 Words

  Halloween. JuJu has been here for a year. She has added so much to our family. She is simply a fuzzy ball of love.   I enjoyed an hour on the phone with Jackie. Her life is her huge family and it occupies her completely. Later I had an hour with Kelle whose life is occupied with stuff and nonsense. Oh well, mine is occupied with words that don’t get written. l won’t go to church today after all. My nose runs and runs and I don’t want to have to remove the mask to wipe it. Soon the phone business.

  Wet. Of course I’ll hunker down again. Thanks to the rebounder I get steps. It’s not like real walking exercise but at least I’m not sitting all the time. Hollie made a research trip to Spectrum about changing our cell phones and tomorrow we will cancel U s   cellular to be ready for the new ones on Monday. I made a start on my story for group on Monday. It won’t be a narrative but a kind of anatomy of the story. I’m enjoying it and my mind is busy with it.

  I did walk and it was a wearifying experience. I was wobbly and kept trying to just walk like I   have my whole life. I don’t know why I falter from the   simple chore of   putting one foot in front   of the other. I will walk again today when the rain stops. The good news is that I had a new idea for the writing prompt. It came from memories of seeing older people congregating in morning coffee huddles. I’ll go from there and travel to small towns and sit with elders to hear stories.

  Good sleep with remote healing from Kelle’s friend Cynthia on the east coast. My left arm feels less alien but still has its tremor. She said my higher self helped to calm my arm. Had a good walk to Walgreen’s yesterday and walked home the long way. Felt wonderful to be outside. Today will start with Safeway for essentials. Another walk to the post office will happen with a stop at the gas company to check on my tank.

Wet and gray with possible clearing later so I can walk to Walgreens’ for my blood pressure prescription. Two social contacts” Michele visited and Family Happy hour.  Meg fills us in on her work. Her boss commended her and she was stoked about that. Michele  and I talk about everything from family to the museum to Netflix. Today I may find something new. I hope to locate my creative part instead of sinking slowly into my couch

  Big agenda: eat breakfast and take a shower. That’s it for this cold wet morning. Then, watch the board meeting. Hope to make contact with the outside world by text or phone. I am becoming content with isolation and that is scary. I don’t challenge myself to read or do a puzzle or attack the computer. Hmm. I’m too much in the comfort zone. Just for today I will pay aaattention and push the self imposed dboundaries.

  The sky is not so dense and dark after a night of pouring rain. Still more to come so an indoor day again. I binged on Netflix with Starling, and Self-made. Both worth watching. I managed 2K steps but wasn’t really interested in more. I do ffeel okay and my digestion seems to be fine again. I promise to eat a better today and not just snack. It’s so easy to drop into the comfort rut and not look for other wasy to spend time. I haven’t been counting words. It seems so silly to worry about little things when the world is so broken.

  Slept well in spite of the roaring storm outside. Dark and pouring and blowing. Nice warm inside day. I felt better by afternoon yesterday. No Moderns shot but the shopping was productive. I binge watched The chair that Michele   had suggested. I tried another Netflix series but it was violent. Don’t need that. Good groceries for nutrition today.   plus ice cream. No plans for church or housework. I can watch the storm and feel comfortable.

  No fun yesterday. Sat and felt mildly nauseous. Grumpy guts and a call to cancel the birthday lunch with Michele. It’s stormy and we are going out to shop early and then get our third Moderna shot. I wish I felt better. Hollie bought me new sheets that   fit my bed and I put them on this morning. Worked up a sweaatt tot do it but I like them a loat.

  Wet windy heavy atmosphere. Broken sleep and too early awake. I don’t feel well. I may have to postpone lunch with Michele for her birthday. I don’t really know how to make words about not wellness. Shaky, weak, uninspired to move, etc. Covid exhaustion, covid isolation, covid depression. All of the above. Usually the dark doesn’t sink in until Halloween but it’s already on for two weeks.   I may sink into the comfort rut or pull myself together, Haven’t decided yet.

  Chuck and Hollie are away on an over night plus Cosco today. I’m glad for them to have a change of routine. Yesterday Ii took care off some sorting and moving and I liked the effect. Felt good to have more order even though my knees paid dearly. Sometimes I just have to get down and fix things. Brought the rebounder inside after taking off the blue covering. It’s too cold now to use it on the sunporch. Today is windy and wet. I will be inside again.

  Yesterday did not develop anything to report. Just not   feeling well. It took all day and lots of effort to get 1K steps on the rebounder. It’s very wet outside and the rain drummed on the roof last night.   Would like to walk to the farmers’ market if it isn’t too wet and windy. I need to push myself out the door whenever possible. Winter is   here whether the calendar says so or not. The dark is here and I sure felt it and acted with more lights.

  Tea and stories was fun and full of love. We   have a good thing for all of us who need socializing and creating. I told my Noah connection and the dearth of family info I grew up without. Today I’ll get out early as wind and rain are forecast. I did housework yesterday so I have time for something I’ve been putting off as in the idea pad. I really truly want to be fluent with 365 word.   There are always yard chores before a storm and winterizing.

  Cool and clear. It’s the only day this week without rain. I will get a walk around the block. Yesterday Ii had 2K steps from the rebounder. It helps to get me out of the chair. I know I sit and snack too much. Later, tea and stories group will meet at 2 for the ancestry prompt. I will tell my family story as I am still not using the new computer for dictating. The Ancestry report is not available any longer. I’m a story teller too.  

  Gray and windy with rain close by. No, I won’t go to church but I am closer to wanting to go. Karen Wert called yesterday and I told her my story about feeling excluded. She says I’m missed and I don’t believe it as nineteen months have gone by with very little contact. Oh well, it’s mine and I’ll fix it when I’m ready. Hollie is going to Wally’s but I don’t want to go. I just want to burrow into my blanket. So goes Sunday.  

  The thirty minute cog test wore me out! I was slow but I think I did it okay. The whole testing took an hour and I’m not sure what they know now. Soon I will have an appointment go over the result. Hollie went to Chan’s and picked up our favorite Szechwan c;how mein. It was the perfect tonic for a long day. Nothing today except walk. Yesterday I went looking for the spice grinder and had a disappointing visit to the office store. Hollie found dream Farm on Amazon and cordered one.

  I had a good walk and was wobbly the last two blocks but made it safely and happily. I took the property papers to the assessor’s office and now the dual ownership is in the system. I want another walk early. Maybe I’ll go the office supply and see if they have a pepper grinder. That’s where I found mine. Later I have the battery of tests at the doctor’s office. I am not looking forward to the mini cog as I know I have lost ground

 Left for Safeway at 7:30, got the list filled, went to the Tractor store for dog food, then Rite Aid for flu shots and home at 8:45. Cold and sunny outside and the wind will come up again soon. I really really want to walk today. It’s been a long time in the house. I never felt well yesterday and was grouchy. Poor JuJu didn’t understand that I didn’t want to play with her while making my bed. I just wanted to get in it and forget the day.

  Inauspicious start for Wednesday. Stepped in dog poop on the way to the bathroom in the dark early hours. Then a long wait for my blood test only to find out the orders weren’t there. Serious headache that stopped the plans to shop in Brookings and home to inhale coffee and wait to feel better. Later I will walk as nothing physical happened yesterday. I do not like having people take care of me and so I don’t ask for what I need. I am learning.

  Cold. The heater didn’t come on until I jiggled the thermostat. Hollie had a face washing when JuJu saw her yesterday. We all missed her and applauded her going for the week,.The giants won. More later. No plans. Maybe get out for a walk if the temperature gets above 50. I’m feeling better than yesterday. Kind of shaky and that is beginning to feel like normal. My physical appointment is Friday and I’m not looking foorwarrd to the tests. I feel I have lost ground this year.

  It was a slow day and I didn’t get dressed at all. The wind was strong and cold. Little household things happened but all in all I wasted the whole day. I watched Fr. Bernie’s sermon on Facebook about healing resentment. It sunk in that I have work to do about St. Paul’s. I did not respond to their open invitation to come to church. Just didn’t want to. Holltie will come home today from her week with Laurie. I miss her. I’m glad she akes care of her needs.

  Gray and damp out. Suddenly the church   folks area paying attention to me but I don’t care. I’m not going to their “try-out” of using the church for a service. What a weird thing to say! I walked to Rumania’s yesterday for chips and cheese. I dragged on the way home. Just not okay sometimes. It burdens my sprite to   have such dire limitations. Long restless night with lots off unusual thought and anxiety. I always have something to do for house happiness. Need to vacuum and sort in the closet.

  Cold sunny morning and I’m grateful for my heater. It takes a long time to heat the house because of the high ceiling. Once the sun shines in the porch, the house doesn’t need the heater any longer. It’s a good place to live. I walked a little yesterday but I was wobbly and unsure so I made it short and got   home safely. I’ll have another go at it today. Being out is my only connection to the community at this time. Might go to the museum.  

  I walked better and longer yesterday than I have in weeks! Felt so good to do more with enjoyment and not just effort. Hope it will happen again with positive feelings. I indulged in snacking and my pants are tight. Last month I lost three pounds and now I need to do it again. Made progress in the closet with sorting and purging. There are still items of clothing that I know I will not wear again. My uniform is jeans and shirts. No need for more.

  Lots of thinking about writing yesterday. Texts about regrouping the tea and stories ladies and I thought of   how many years it was easy to think and write. Now I appreciate the way I could do that and want to find my way back with the dictate ap on the new computer. Winter is coming and it’s time to have a plan. Rosalie has so many handwork skills and is always coming up with a new idea like the wall hangings she made of Karen and me.

  Cold morning. Awake at 4 freezing. Had to fix the thermostat to get some relief. Took the cotton quilt off the bed and put the down one on. I may walk to the farmers’ market this morning after it gets above 50 degree. Or not. I do not like to be cold. No plans. Just another day in paradise. Karen Quivey set the 18 th to get story regrouped. I’m glad even though I have no way to write a story yet. I can tell one. I miss writing.

  Yes to laundry and a walk around the block. I decided to follow Hollie’s blood pressure record and mine is high. Way too high like 157/94. Egads. Good thing to track before my physical later this month. I will finish sorting the closet when the train start but first breakfast and a walk. I started sorting early this morning and see how much I have simply shoved things around instead of planning. I will read a short story and play music. The rain is welcome.

  It was a lovely garden party complete with conversation and refreshments. I had a Hawaiian beer, goat cheese dip, humus and crackers and an ice cream bar. I enjoyed the whole thing. It was so encouraging to have a social gathering. Almost a normal day in this crazy time. Hollie is off to Newport for her Laurie fix. She was ready to go. Chuck and I have a week together and it will be fine. I have no plans. Hope to get laundry and a walk for today.

  1 In and out of Safeway already planning for a week as Hollie is going to Newport with Laurie. I can walk to the store if something calls me but I have planet of the necessary ingredients to fend for myself. I’m very happy that Hollie has this much needed break. She and Laurie have such a long fun history and they both need to blow off steam and they do it well together. It’s foggy but it will burn off our   gathering social at Rosalie’s later.

  It was a pleasure to spend time with Linda yesterday. We went to SeaQuake and ate inside. It’s been a long time since that has happened. Half the tables were empty and the service was different but we had taco salads and lots of conversation. I enjoyed her garden talk and her activities at St. Timothy’s with the homeless folks in Brookings. She is in the right place for how the world is now. She listened to my church story and said I would always be welcome there.

  Oh boy, two things today! Dog nails and lunch with Linda Lee. I will tell her about my issues with St. Paul’s and see if it makes sense to her. I enjoy her and her deacon adventures. She is so active and involved. I had a walk around the block yesterday and it was a lovely time. Today is foggy but not cold. But first comes breakfast and I look forward to it. Rosalie and I talkd for 40 minutes making plans for a little social on Sunday.